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Monday, 14 May 2018

CRUSHED CHAPTER 39

"I needed air" I excused myself as I walked into the house ignoring his anger and possibly avoiding a fight.
"Air. The balcony is filled with that Gabby. You know what's out there and I told you not to go out alone but you taunted it...what if something bad happened to you?" He frowned.
"First off, I'm fine. Secondly, why the hell didn't you call me? Didn't you think I would be worried? I called the office Luke, you weren't there. Where the fuck where you??" I asked, low key praying to God I hold my anger in.
"I had things to do" his expression closed up as I noticed he was obviously hiding something.
"Things like what?" I questioned further.
"Private things Gaby." He muttered.
"What do you mean private things? Am I not supposed to be told everything?!" I raged.
I don't understand why he's acting this way to me and I do not like it.
"Damn it Gaby!" He banged his hand on the door frame where he stood and suddenly, I could not recognize the man I talked with.
"They're personal. Obviously meaning you shouldn't know them. In other words, none of your business. Just one order...one single fucking order and you disobey it! Can't you see that I'm trying my best to save you? I'm trying to keep you safe! The least you can do is appreciate it and stop acting like a child!" He scolded.
I can't believe he just said I was acting like a child...can't seem to believe he indirectly called me ungrateful.
"I'm sorry..but maybe I don't need saving.." With that, I felt a flood of tears rage my eyes as I ran upstairs to our room.
Why is everything in my life going wrong now? Just why? I have never felt so degraded in my life!
Immediately I got in, I locked the door shut and threw the key across the room as I fell to my knees crying like a child I indeed acted as.
Everything I was holding in, I cried them out. Both the words I withheld and the ones I was going to say later to his fucking face, I let them out.
My heart ached as anger and sadness grew inside me. I hated this feeling.
"Gabby, please open the door" Luke said softly from the other end.
If he thinks I'm gonna open up, let alone answer him then he's the biggest joker of the year.
"I'm sorry" he voiced out.
Yeah, I wish I believed shit.
I ran my hands over my eyes as I angrily stood and walked into the shower.
//
After fifteen solid minutes of soaking in the bath tub to release the bad energies because I read somewhere online that it's a calming technique. I opened the shower door to find Luke sitting on the bed with his hands covering his face.
"I have a spare key to every room in the house" he stupidly said like I asked.
"Whatever" I tried my wet hair in a bun as I searched the wardrobe for something tight to sleep in.
"I'm sorry for the way I acted.... I"
"I said whatever. I don't wanna hear it. You're sorry? Got it. Good night" I cut him off.
Now I know the silly calming technique I got online doesn't work because I was mad as hell.
I'm glad he got the point and shut it mouth up.
†††
The chirp of birds and rays from the sun alerted me that it was a new day indeed. It felt like I had only closed my eyes for an hour even though I had the freedom to wake whenever I chose to. I won't lie, I couldn't sleep. The scenario kept replaying in my head making it hard to find peace. I didn't realize when I fell asleep though.
When I finally let my eyes wander, I couldn't find him in bed. In fact, it didn't look like he slept here.
*sigh*
Why should this man be so difficult?
As I lifted the blankets off my body, a note fell to the floor.
"I know I'm a jerk. Worse than that. Please come downstairs... "
Okay, maybe he's not so..difficult, but he's a jerk.
I ran the heater on as I groomed my brows and ran a fresh coat of black cortex on my fingernails and toes.
Too early to put on black? Nah.
Soon, I had my bath and straightened my perfectly dark hair..for once, I actually felt independent and pretty.
I sluggishly walked down the stairs with my nose and head held up like a queen.
The house was rather empty like rapture took place. My heart raced until I sighted Luke who sat on the sofa reading the morning papers.
What's he so focused for?
"Good morning" he greeted as our eyes met.
"Yeah" I answered awkwardly.
You know how when you fight with someone and the next day you feel guilty and want to apologize but you remember all they did the previous day then get a little uneasy? That's how I felt now.
Apart of me wanted to cuddle him till he dies and the other part wants to stuff that newspaper in his mouth till he gives up. Oh wait, they both have one end result.. Death.
"I made you breakfast" he announced dropping the papers.
"I'm not hungry" I lied.
I was starving! I had little to eat last night. I was too busy crying that I missed my sleep patterns too.
"Where are my brothers? And Quinn?" I asked.
"Oh Quinn and Edwin took them for skating" he answered innocently.
Pffft sinful goat. Is he really gonna act like we're okay?
"What did you need me downstairs for?" I hardened my expression.
"Babe I'm so sorry for the way I acted last night" he started.
"Oh so now I'm 'babe' again? I thought it was
damn it Gabby! " I mocked.
He sighed" I was tensed up. I found Travis and got him to talk. He said stuffs that made me mad. And when I came home to find you gone, I was torn Gabby. I was so scared that they might have taken you away. I couldn't think straight. My battery has been dead and I couldn't reach you. I should be the man to love you and cherish you. Not the kind to order you around against your will".
Oh shit, now I feel twice as guilty.
"You should have told me instead of yelling" I tried to bury my guilt but I'm not so sure it was working.
"I'm sorry. I promise never to do that. I couldn't sleep with the thought that I acted like a monster to you. Baby I'm a mess" he dug his hair into my laps as he held my waist.
"No I'm the bigger mess for not letting you explain. I don't like it when we fight" I kissed his hair.
"Me neither baby girl.. Its never happening again" he assured.
"Thank you"
"Now can we eat? I know you and I can tell when you're lying" he laughed as he poker my nose.
"What? Me? I wasn't lying... I just wasn't hungry then" I yelped as he swept me off my feet, kissing and carrying me to the dining.

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